Procrastinators Would Unite Tomorrow, if Their Writing Wasn’t Blocked, Maybe

By El Ochiis

How can you convince yourself to write when even your imaginary friends won’t talk to you? Writer’s block, and some form of procrastination, probably existed since the invention of writing.  But you can blame English poet, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, who first described his “indefinite indescribable terror” at not being able to produce work he thought worthy of his talent. Of course, soon afterwards, “French writers latched onto the idea of a suffering connected to writing and expanded it to create the myth that all writers possessed a tortured soul, and were unable to write without anguish.”

Speaking of the French, and, writers, it has been after I’ve finished reading Flaubert’s Madame Bovary that I cease tapping letters on my keyboard in an attempt to produce what I believe is a Man Booker award-winning novel and clean my closets in search of a blanket to use for curling into a fetal position. How can any writer pen something as prolific as Flaubert? Well, firstly, he lived with his mother and didn’t have to pay rent or buy food. You see how that just happened, I was writing about avoiding the task of writing, leading to writer’s block, yet I managed to digress. But, this should count as part of the subject matter – wait, I had to perform hours of research on the internet – oh look, I found a cute cat video that just had to be posted on Facebook, then, tally how many likes – crap, a day has been shot to Hades, but, I still had a few more days to finish that piece.

Back to the subject, I think. You see, any female who has given birth, knows that to nurture another human being whilst churning out prose worthy of publication, for financial compensation, is nearly impossible. My point, Flaubert was not a mother? Oh dear, maybe some of us writers may simply suffer from attention-deficit disorder. Nah, it’s definitely procrastination.  

Tim Urban says that procrastinators’ brains are the same as non-procrastinators, save for the presence of a little friend called an “instant gratification monkey.” This monkey seems to be a lot of fun, but, in fact he/she is nothing but a ton of trouble – monkeying around is fun but not productive when you’re under pressure to produce.

So, does a writer, tackle procrastination that leads to blocked writing or vice versa? Well, after having researched both for days BEFORE I managed to tackle writing this piece, I came across some advice that even I would agree is helpful:

1. Form a relationship with your inner critic – you know, the one inside your head that is capable of convincing you to bring your writing to a complete halt through a huge dose of self-doubt, leading to self-deprecation. “Have you overdosed on metaphors?” “I think you could use a better opening, couldn’t you?” Stephen King struggled with it and Margaret Atwood was well acquainted with its debilitating effects – I doubt there is a writer who hasn’t been blocked by his/her own inner critic.  

   

2. Talk to your characters – like you would converse with a friend or stranger who is trying to make your acquaintance or you his/hers - seriously, at the center of all stories are characters. Then, if they are not clearly defined in your mind, you most likely to come crashing straight towards writer’s block. Some conversations to have with your character(s):

a. If your house was on fire and he could run back inside and save one thing, what would that be?

b. What is the one trait you deplore in yourself?

c. What is your idea of perfect happiness?

Create a profile for your character(s):

1. The outer layer – physical appearance and the basics: name, place of birth, height, weight, speech, communication – stuff that makes each person different from the rest.

2. The Flesh – (past or backstory) - characters are products of their environments (family and external relationships)

3. The core – deep down, who is your character? Play with psychology – is he/she street or book smart? What does your character want in the story?

3. Take a walk – no, really – walking can help a writer think.  Writing IS thinking. A study at Stanford has found that walking improves creativity – it can actually help improve brain function and allow you to come to more effective and novel solutions.

Walk along a river, lake or trail, have a goal for your walk, at least one mile, before you give in to fatigue, heat, cold or procrastination, leading to writer’s blockage, or, vice versa. If you weren’t able to complete numbers one and two, you will AFTER you’ve walked.