By Chris Mathews
Writing non-fiction does not have to be a dry,
pedestrian venture. In fact, in today’s internet world, original ways of
approaching real-life events can make the difference between prose that touches
people and prose that bores.
In the piece that follows, I tried to inject the
simple act of doing a project with my grandchild into a piece that captured the
frustration and joy of the experience.
Excavating
the Triceratops with Poppy and Granddaughter Sidney Grace
On
Saturday, August 18th, in Ridgeland ,
South Carolina , Poppy and his
granddaughter Sidney Grace Mathews unearthed and reconstructed a triceratops, defined
by Wikipedia as a genus of herbivorous ceratopsid dinosaurs which lived during
the late Mesozoic period. Forget that scientists now think that this famous,
fearsome three-horned triceratops was actually a younger version of the
torosaurus. Forget that Ridgeland, South
Carolina has never been known for its tarpits (in fact,
it barely has a ridge). Forget that this monumental achievement will never be
displayed in the Smithsonian.
Poppy and Gracie dug out a triceratops together,
using only a small blue, plastic spade and brush. Gracie did most of the
brushing, Poppy scraped with the spade. This joint expedition took place in the
Mathews’ den atop a glass coffee table.
The team of Poppy and Gracie unearthed this find
by extricating a clay egg enclosed in vacuum-sealed plastic labeled Dino World
Fossil Kit. Excavating instructions were listed on the back in both English and
Spanish:
1. While
over an easily cleanable surface or newspaper, remove the dino egg from its
wrapper. MarMar, grandma, suggested the kitchen table as the
perfect location for this expedition but Poppy wanted a challenge, so he placed
a poster sized “No Diving” sign on the clear glass wood-rimmed table.
2. Make
sure that the egg is firmly held in place. Carefully, remove dirt using the
excavating tools provided (the previously mentioned spade and brush)
Wanting results, Poppy left out the “carefully”. After shaving slivers for a
short time, he squeezed the clay to smithereens. Gracie reveled in the clay,
fragments cascading off the table and onto the carpet, leaving her looking like
a street urchin. Feeling the exhilaration of risk-takers, the two opted not to
“WEAR EYE PROTECTION” as posted at the bottom of this step.
3. When
done removing dirt, clean fossils using the brush. It is very important to
remove all dirt from holes that are used to connect pieces to allow a more
secure fit. Poppy discovered this important fact as Gracie
brushed off the pieces and he tried to force the tiny nubs into the dinosaur’s
torso.
4. Never
force the pieces together. If they are not fitting, check for dirt in the
holes. Poppy jammed the nubs of the legs into the tiny holes, but
only managed to reconstruct a three-legged Triceratops with tail and horned
head. Each time Poppy wedged the last leg in its hole, another leg fell off.
The plastic legs matched the light tan carpet exactly so finding one that
dropped was not easy. After twenty minutes of dropping, picking-up, and
twisting legs, Poppy had taken on the demeanor of a mad scientist. Sidney
Grace, however, did not lose confidence in Poppy. She just kept playing with
the clay, spilling a few crumbs on the carpet as MarMar gleamed with pride at
the two with a look of “I knew it wouldn’t stay on the table”.
Finally, after blowing profusely in the holes
and delicately washing and blow-drying these tiny orifices, Poppy assembled the
Triceratops on four legs. Sidney Grace was impressed, even though Poppy failed
to mount the two back legs in the two holes provided on the plastic stand shown
in the illustration, deeming the stand “for nincompoops”. After the two proudly
gazed at their tiny monstrosity, Marc, Sidney Grace’s dad and Poppy’s son,
proclaimed “naptime” for the smudged-face waif.
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